“I want to exercise, okay?”

The first snow after my parents bought their first house, mother nature dumped 3 inches onto the ground. No biggie. Unfortunately, it soon came to our understanding that shoveling 3″ of snow for a driveway that is the length of a lot is a lot of work. The house itself is not big and nor is the lot, but the driveway can fit 7 cars plus the garage. Everyone soon realized that when a major snow storm hits, it’s going to be a (insert expletive here) trying to shovel it.

Now I’m off on my own and my sister is away at school. My dad is not the young man he use to be and being the only breadwinner, his body has taken a beating quicker than most men his age (except he still looks dead handsome, according to my mom’s sisters). So it was obvious that a snowblower would do the trick.

Two years ago, my mom, my sister and I pitched in to get my dad a snowblower for Christmas. Being the picky person my dad is when it comes to electronics, he was not satisfied with the choice and said the money could be better off used to pay the bills. So he returned it. 3 weeks later, the first major snowstorm his and dumps 9 inches. I stayed over and helped my dad shovel the snow off the whole (expletive) driveway. Never again.

That was last year. This year, the first snow storm laced the driveway with 5 inches. I happened to be out of town that weekend. Let’s just say my dad finally came to terms with his age. Instead of waking up early and shoveling before work as he always has, he left for work, returned home, took a nap and then shoveled for an hour clearing 1/3 of the driveway and went to bed because he was tired. Victory for us getting him a snow blower? No.

Second snowstorm, 6 inches. I came after midnight to clear 4 inches for my dad and left him the last two for him to do before work. Maybe he’ll take pity. No.

Third snowstorm, 7 inches. I had a snow day for school. I’m not going out to the ‘rents. I’m staying in and enjoying it. As for my dad? Still pretends he’s in his twenties.

Today, fourth snowstorm this year, 9 inches with 2″ of wet snow/ice underneath. Before my dad left for work, he did some minor shoveling. My mom “told” him that he wouldn’t have to do all this work if he didn’t return the snowblower. To which, he vehemently replied, “I want to exercise, okay?”

I came right from school today to help out. 35 minutes and I cleared 2 car lengths. (expletive) that, I’m going to buy my own snowblower and he can use it if he pleases because I ain’t shoveling THAT again:

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