The Hard Hat

Since the Archdiocese is moving buildings, the IT folks has to set up the network and infrastructure of the new locations.  That being said, seeing how both sites are still under construction, we were issued hard hats.  So after taking 15 minutes how to assemble my hard hat, I thought I’d be cool, versus being one of the freaks who don’t normally wear hard hats, and put my hat on backwards like all the real construction workers.  That’s right, this guy is going to blend in.

Yeah… (scratches head) …this is not working out for me.

I may pretend to look the look, but I sure ain’t hell pulling it off.

Reasons why I can never be a construction worker:

#1 – Most construction workers are either white or hispanic.  Unfortunately, being Asian automatically associates me as an engineer.  Thus, when I enter the construction site, all the people look at me with the “oh-great-it’s-smart-engineer-who-is-trying-to-look-cool-by-wear-his-hat-backwards-but-he’s-not-cool-at-all-and-is-definitely-not-one-of-us” look.

#2 – In a construction site, NEVER and I mean NEVER touch another man’s tools.  This rule applies both inside and out side of the port-o-potties.  That being said, when we had to cart boxes of Cat6 cable over from our current location to the new one (which means crossing Michigan Ave and sticking out like a sore thumb), we knew there was no way we were going to carry it down the stairs.  Thank you freight lift.  Alas, one of the construction worker’s cart was in the way.  Sergio had the bright idea of telling me to push in back so we can have access to the lift.  And so, I proceed to push the cart back about 2 feet.  And then, all the tools fell off the cart…onto the floor…and made a loud crashing noise.  Damn.  I looked at Sergio.  He looked at me.  I looked at Mike.  Mike pretended that he does not know Sergio nor I.  Damn.

We then heard from a distance, “What the hell fell!”  We all wanted to run at that moment except I was stuck behind the once filled tool cart, Mike was stick behind the cable cart and Sergio just froze because the construction worker appeared.

“He did.”  Sergio said as he pointed at me.

Thanks dude.

#3 – Hard hats are meant to protect things falling on you and hitting your head.  It does not prevent you from your own stupidity.  You would think that wearing a hard hat, you would realize that you have an extra 3-4″ on you (if only I could grow that in height).  Alas, standing up from a low place to a low ceiling in one motion means you falling back down and having your colleagues laugh at you.

#4 – Construction workers wear hard hats so they don’t have to carry them.  Besides, that’s their job so they’re allowed to wear hard hats.  I on the other hand wear my hard hat down Magnificent Mile because I my hands are occupied with other things I have to carry.  People look at me and I just keep on walking.  Yessir, I have a hard hat on and yes, that is a server in my hands as I wear my nice Euro jacket or hipster zipper hoodie.

#5 – Construction folks are bulky, strong and have the occasional beer gut.  I’m a short little Asian boy.  People often wonder what I actually could do at a construction site.

#6 – I just look like an idiot w/ my hard hat & safety goggles (over my glasses).  That’s just more than enough proof to say that I don’t belong.



5 thoughts on “The Hard Hat

  1. Pingback: Favorite 2008 Blog Posts « .:: phampants

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