If you could go back in time and talk to yourself 10 years ago, what would you say? Would you tell yourself to not ditch school and go get ice cream that one afternoon? How about telling yourself that you should train harder because the school track record is within reach? Maybe you would thank yourself for wearing the geekiest shirt you have to a party because it was the best idea ever. Or perhaps moving your furniture into your room a semester early while you were away on an internship was not the best idea because it became the make out room. What would you say?
Here are 10 things that I would say to my 14 year old self:
1. TALK TO GIRLS! Trust me, they don’t bite nor do they have cooties. They are pretty, cute, adorable and smell pretty. There is nothing to be afraid of. They’re nice and are willing to talk to you. Just don’t be afraid and stop being shy. Have confidence. They’re just like you only with boobs and much cooler. They will help you become a lot cooler if you just talk to them..okay maybe not, but you can hope. You may not believe me, but one day you’ll have more female friends than male friends. However, they’re not going to say hi until you say hi. Oh, one more thing, don’t ask a girl out to prom via IM. Call her!
2. Dress better. You’re not a large. Wear clothes that fit you. Also, there is nothing wrong with jeans. Ditch the khakis as your pants of choice; jeans are comfy and stylish. As for all those free t-shirts you have, ditch them and get cool shirts. Yeah, the mathlete shirt is just not cutting it. There will be a website that you will find call Threadless. They will make you look cooler instantly. Polos and button down shirts will make you look less like a bum. Also, you need better shoes. It’s okay to have more than 4 pairs of shoes. Eventually you will learn and understand fashion. But do me a favor and learn it sooner than later. Your sister being your fashion guru is quite embarrassing. Plus, it will help with the ladies. 😉
3. Get a cell phone! Don’t wait until your senior year of college to get a cell phone. You’ll be that loser who no one could get in touch with. Also, it royally sucks when you have to call your friends via a calling card on a land line phone. People want to hang out with you but they’re not going to know where you are unless you have a cell phone. When you do get a cell, get a texting plan too. Otherwise, you’re going to be way behind the mobile phone revolution.
4. Stay in touch with all your friends. When you’re in college, don’t just hang out with one group. Diversify your friends. You’re going to forget about your dorm mates, the SUCMA Cocks, and you’re going to regret it later in life. As different they are from you, you have more in common than you think. As for after college, don’t just forget those who you weren’t that close friends with. They will become a lot better friends after college. Finally, you will lose one of your best friend towards the end of college. Don’t let that happen.
5. Study abroad in college and travel more. You’re going to miss out on a great opportunity if you don’t. I know you don’t have money but hey, that’s what loans are for. Find a place to study aboard and see the world. You always want to travel, but it will be easier if you study aboard. So when you have a chance to travel, do it! Also, when you go to Australia, do me a favor and visit New Zealand too. You’re going regret it later on.
6. Pull more pranks. I know you’re a loser but trust me, people will respect you and come to you. You’re going to be a mastermind prankster. You’re going to call the senior prank and pull the best prank on the vice principal, twice. Your RA junior year, he wished you did pull a prank on him. Just because he lives next door and know that you’re a prankster shouldn’t stop you. (Hint: penis pendulum slap.) Also, when you pull the pink balloon prank, use an air tank. It will be so much easier and faster. Just remember, keep all the pranks classy.
7. Coffee is bad for you. Limit yourself to 1 cup a day. Otherwise, you’re just going to get jittery and embarrass yourself.
8. RUN! When Fr. Zi comes down the hallway after school recruiting people to run, sign up! What’s going to happen is that you will be running later on in life. Yes, you will be come a runner. Not just 5K but half marathons. You’re going to run for fun. As sacriligious as it is, you’re going to enjoy it. However, it’s going to be easier on yourself 10 years later (aka me) if you have ran in high school. You’ll be a better runner, have a better form and be faster. Yes, I know how crazy I may sound right now. Fr. Zi will kick your ass and make you run like crazy. Trust me, it’ll be worth it 10 years later. In the meantime, you’re just going to suffer and I’ll reap the benefits. 😀
9. You’re going to become a teacher. The kids will love you. Yes, there will be haters but in the end the kids will like you. You’re young, cool, hip, voted the best dressed and made of awesome. And it’s not just the nerds who will like you, it’s the cool kids and the jocks that will back you up against their classmates saying that you’re awesome. Yes, you’re going to be the cool teacher. But remember, you’re always going to be watched. The kids will look up to you, so whatever you do, they will know. Don’t be their friend, be the teacher that they need. Be the hard ass that will make the kids will hate you but in the end know that you were the best they had. Don’t forget that. They will appreciate you more in the end.
10. Don’t let your parents control you. It’s your life. Do not be afraid of them. Do not have them dictate your life. Do what you want and hang out with your friends. You don’t have to come home right away. You don’t have miss post-prom. Take charge of your life now. Otherwise, you’re going to miss out and regret it. Be yourself and be happy. Don’t let them make you miserable. It’s your life not theirs. Finally, there will be one night in November your freshman year of college that I need you to do this. When you hang up that phone, go for a walk on the Quad and remind yourself, you’re in control of your own life. It’s your life. Do what makes you happy.