Why We’re Messed Up

Ever wonder why we are so messed up?

Those panic attacks, depressed days and random anger bursts all happen not because there’s a chemical imbalance in your head.  Heck, the drug use, alcohol abuse and OCD behaviors are all connected.  Not successful in your career?  Wonder why you’re extra violent?  You’re not to blame.  All of these things are connected.  We’re all messed up not because of the hormones they put into our food.  It’s something greater and more powerful that took over our lives when we were young.  We are messed up because of:

Cartoons.

Everyone grows up on cartoons: our parents, us and our children.  Cartoons are more than the free babysitter.  It’s the brainwashing tool that turns out brains into mush so that The Others can model us into their own ways.

Think about it.  How many hours of cartoons did you watch a day when you were a little kid?  Young developing minds are frozen because cartoons would mesmerize children as they sit in front of the tube.  Tiny nano waves would flow from the TV into the minds of kids to reprogram our internal thinking such that we can never fully us our human mind to its fullest potential.  As adults we would always want to do something greater but our reprogram prohibits us to do so.  Therefore, our wasted mind either finds things so it can cope with failure or short circuits.

Cartoons are evil.  They are the cause of the demise of the human race.

Banana Splits, Tom & Jerry, Aquaman, He-Man, Transformers, Digimon, Pokemon, Fraggle Rock, Might Max, Prince Planet, The Muppets, HR Pufensnuf (the name says all), Teletubbies, The Tick, TMNT, Beetlejuice…the list goes on.

Cartoons – the reason why I’m been messed up since 1984.

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12 thoughts on “Why We’re Messed Up

  1. Tom & Jerry, He-Man, Transformers, Gi Joe, TMNT and Scooby Doo helped mold me into who I am today.

    I’m a scattered, unfocused lunatic searching around on WordPress.com for something funny.

    I think you may be on to something, PHAMPANTS.

  2. Cartoons have definitely been significantly studied and it’s proven that the cartoons we watched when we were little contained SOOOOO much more violence than any movie or news story.

  3. And here I thought it was my parents’ messy breakup and my mother’s serial dating that caused my life issues.

    Man, I wish you were around a year ago before I decided to waste money on therapy. 😛

  4. I’m with Katie. It was me having to turn from the divorce to rely on cartoons that screwed me. But I’d have it no other way. Bring on the ‘toons.

  5. I’ve been wanting to be a Ghostbuster since the late 80s because of that cartoon. I also think that blasting your enemies with a condensed stream of nuclear energy is the best way to solve any problem.

    Great post.

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