Can of Sardines

Dear lovely readers and made of awesome people,

I am currently flying across the Atlantic on my way to Ireland to overcome my quarter-life crisis begin my European adventure.  Even though I will be abroad, worry not for I will not leave you all hanging.  I will be tweeting my mishaps, posting drunken scenic photos on flickr & facebook and yes, uploading short videos on YouTube.  Seeing how I am packed like a can of sardines on this flight, I’ll leave you with this wonderful post to ponder about:

Frequent fliers know that we go through a lot, long before ever set foot on the airplane.  After booking what you think is a cheap flight, you find out that someone booked the same flight for half the price 5 minutes later.  It’s bad enough that the airlines screw you up front, but they like to stick around and give it to you in the back when you get to the airport with the baggage fees.  Now that you feel dirty all over, you realize that you still have to go through security check where you pretty much lose your dignity as they scan, pat and wave the magic wand all over you.  As you button yourself up racing to the gate, you encounter “that” person who stands in the passing lane of the moving walkway.  When all is said and done, you finally arrive to your gate to find that your flight is overbooked.

The funny thing is that all the joys you experienced before stepping on the plane is not as bad once you get on board.  Sitting in an assigned seats for hours at a time next to strangers, a crying baby, the kicking kid and the coughing grandma from afar, you can only hope that your seat is half decent.  But which is the best seat?

The Window Seat

Deep inside, we all want the window seat.  You not only can look outside anytime you want, but you also have the power to control whether the window is open or closed.  Kids envy you, people from the aisle turn to you for a quick glimpse and people stuck in the middle seat curse you for the better seat.  When you want to sleep, you just take your pillow and lean it against the wall.  You are the king…until you have to pee and everyone next to you is asleep.  What do you do?  Do you wake them up?  Climb over the seats in hopes that you don’t step on the guy’s crotch next to you?  Shit!  The pee is coming.  Got to act fast!

The Middle Seat

You’re only one seat away from the window, so you can still look outside without having to lean half your body over the person next to you.  Additionally, if you have to go to the bathroom, you can get out without too much disruption.  The only problem is that you’re cramped up with no where to go.  To make matters worse, the sleeping person in the aisle is leaning on your shoulder.  Oh wait, the window person is rotating and is moving to your other free shoulder.  Come on!

The Aisle Seat

You have all the leg room in the world.  You can stretch your feet out into the aisle and not feel all cramped out.  What’s even better is that you have at least one armrest all to yourself.  No sharing needed.  Got to go to the bathroom?  No worries, just stand up and go.  You are the most comfortable person in the cabin until the meal cart comes around and BANG!  The flight attendant rams the cart into your foot.  As you jump up and hop around in pain, one of the person sitting next to you says, “Since you’re already up, do you mind getting my bag for me?”

No matter what seat you get, you’re still packed like a can of sardines and there’s nothing you can do about it.  In the end, the airlines will screw you over and over again.  And when you think it’s over, they come back for a quickie by losing your luggage.

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5 thoughts on “Can of Sardines

  1. I’m new around here and this is my first random blog that I read. Thank you! It was a lovely experience! :). I hope you enjoy your journey, Ireland, the seats and the quickies. I’ll be sure to be updated!

  2. So very true. I’ve flown sitting in all three of those seat options, and I think the window is the best. Why? ‘Cause I’ve never had to pee while on the plane. Ha. Maybe when I have to, that’ll change.

  3. I get a little claustrophobic in the window seat. But, it’s still better than the middle seat. I’m a leaner and when I sit in the middle seat, I have to sit straight up. Assuming I don’t know the people next to me, of course.

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