My Secret Birthday Gift To Myself

I’ve been secretly training and losing weight for my birthday since April.  I became unhappy with my body and sad that I wasn’t running anymore.  I felt that something was taken from me. I wanted it back, but most of all, I wanted control again.  Control of my birthday.

Since 2007, every birthday of mine, I ran 10 miles.  Some times alone, some times with my fellow runnerds, but always 10 miles. I was training for the Chicago Distance Classic, now Rock ‘n’ Roll Chicago, and my birthday always landed on a 10 mile week/weekend. Being the introvert that I am, plus not being a person who really celebrate (let alone enjoys) my birthday, I decided to do my long run on my birthday.  It was my way to celebrate, so to speak.

Then 2 years ago, I got injured and stopped running.  No more running. No more birthday runs. The little special me time that I used to celebrate this day of my birthday was gone.  I missed it. But most of all, I missed having that control/introvert time of my birthday.  Where people don’t acknowledge it, but instead allow me to zone out & be me.

So at the end of April, I decided I wanted it back.  I started to run again. It was slow and painful, but I wanted to work myself up to this birthday gift to myself.  This gift of running 10 miles.  That is, until I won the lottery to the NYC Marathon.  So I added a 5K to it.  I’m fine with running a half marathon on my birthday.  A solo half marathon.  Something for me.  My gift to myself.  I’m excited and nervous cuz I’ve worked so hard and it’s only 5 days away.

I have high expectations and terrified that I would fail like I did this past Saturday on my long run. But most of all, I just wanted to coast along the lakefront.


5 thoughts on “My Secret Birthday Gift To Myself

  1. Good luck and happy birthday for Saturday too!
    I hope you enjoy the half marathon, it sounds as though you have worked really hard to prepare.

  2. First time stopping by your blog! yay another dude blogger in chicago! As a rare racer, I love the solo “races” on the lakefront. Very relaxing for me. Keep up the hard work!

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